| East Coast Wrestling Association - March 25, 2000 - Newport, DE |
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| Friday, March 24, 2000 | |||
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A title change in a bloody cage match as well as the Connecticut Connection's continuing to spread turmoil throughout the East Coast Wrestling Association highlighted the monthly ECWA card held on March 25 at the St. Matthew's Parish Center in Newport, DE. Attendance estimated at 675-700. Ring announcers: BILLY K and CHUCK RISTANO. Timekeeper at the bell: JEFF "I KNOW THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A COW AND A CHICKEN" AMDUR. Manning the ECWAtron video screen: "FLYIN" RYAN O'BRIEN. Referees for the evening: PAUL TURNER, BOB DENSMORE and LARRY PEACE. Taking pictures for your-guess-is-as-good-as-mine: BERNIE DIEHL. Numerous personalities in attendance: wrestlers "DOOMSDAY" DANNY ROSE, DON "EL SVELTO" MONTOYA, JOHNNY KASHMERE (injured, which is why his partner wrestled solo tonight), BRIAN LOGAN and the HAAS BROTHERS; trainees from BONEBREAKERS; promoters BLAINE DeSANTIS and DENNIS CORALLUZZO; FWA timekeeper JIM TITUS; superfans BOB and SARGE MAGEE, BRETT SCHWAN, JIM BRAMBILLA and JOHN "HAWAIIAN HAT GUY" BAILEY; and some idiot who kept yelling out my name while accusing me of inhaling. MATCH 1: "MAXIMUM" JOHNNY MAXX & "THE ALL-AMERICAN" JEFF PETERSON & QENAAN CREED pinned "MR SHOWMANSHIP" RIK RATCHET & "FABULOUS" MOZART FONTAINE & MONSIEUR OOH LA LA (with, respectively, FELIPE THE POOL BOY & E.S. EASTON & BARRY CASINO) in 8:48. Ooh's pre-match disrobing ceremony had Felipe visibly hot and bothered, as the libidinous pool boy eagerly picked up Ooh's clothes, including one item from under Ooh's feet. The early part of the match was all Creed as Qenaan went to work on Fontaine, culminating in his hitting Mozart with a plancha onto the floor. Taunting Jeff and Johnny to the point that the ref turning to keep them (Jeff and Johnny) out, the bad guys then triple-teamed Qenaan. It was over five minutes into the match that Creed finally was able to tag a partner for the first time. Maxx hit Ratchet with some elbow smashes. Ratchet more than held his own until he was hit by a Maxx bulldog. Johnny then tagged to Jeff, who executed a frog splash off the top rope and covered for the pin. The ECWAtron cameras then went snooping backstage and caught a conversation between E.S. EASTON and COWBOY JOHNNY BLAZE. Easton reminded Blaze that the former "King of the Texas bullrope matches" had hit a career plateau about nine years ago and had fallen from his former glory. Easton promised that he would re-make Blaze into a new star. That being said, Cowboy followed Easton out of the room. Going into another room, ECWAtron caught KEVIN KELLY with his CONNECTICUT CONNECTION of INFERNO KID, J.R. RYDER and B.W. BROWN (who had apparently had an oogie-ectomy since his scandalous joining up with Kelly's group) offering VINCE GOODNITE a spot in the Connection. When Vince said "no way", he was slapped by Kelly and stomped by the Connection until ECWA promoter JIM KETTNER arrived and chased Kelly and friends away. Kettner then turned to GREGORY MARTIN (who, with MARK SHRADER, had been talking to Jim) and offered him the injured Goodnite's spot on tonight's card. MATCH 2: TRENT ACID pinned ACE DARLING in 12:56. The audience seemed evenly divided for this match, with Ace picking up much of the male support as Trent (the man who singlehandedly returned the term "teeny bopper" to my consciousness) had the large contingent of shrieking teenage females at his beck and call. Ace sent Trent to the corner with a vicious drop kick; but Trent soon clotheslined Ace over the ropes and followed with a 180-degree plancha off the turnbuckle onto Ace on the floor. Acid was himself sent to the floor by a Darling super kick. A fast flurry of near-fall exchanges followed after such moves as a Darling flying DDT and leg drop; Acid with a sunset flip; Darling's version of the "perfect plex"; Acid's top-rope Frankensteiner; another Darling superkick; Trent with a top rope body press; Darling with a pile driver. Acid was finally able to get the 3-count with a small package that left Ace quite unhappy as he left the ring. The next match was scheduled on the card as BRUTE FORCE vs. THUNDER. Brute Force came to the ring, with head Brute VIPER leading the way, followed by CARNAGE, STUD and the newest member of the entourage, GROUND ZERO. Viper, after noticing that Thunder's tag team partner was not around, noted that in the booking, it did not specify who or how many of the Brute Force members would oppose Thunder. So, he took it to mean "all three" members would oppose Thunder. Note: Viper lost count, it would be a 4-against-1 match. MATCH 3: THUNDER defeated BRUTE FORCE (VIPER & CARNAGE & STUD & GROUND ZERO) as a result of a disqualification after 9:40. Thunder was able to keep the opposition at bay for the first minute or so, even getting a 2-count on Viper; but he was then triple- and quadruple-teamed for most of the rest of the match. BF was disqualified after they threw the referee out of the ring after making a save for Stud, who had been small-packaged. They continued to pummel Thunder until his usual tag-team partner, the chair-wielding MARK "THE SHARK" SHRADER, scattered the opposition. After the match, Shrader assured Thunder that he would be there for him in the future, and challenged Brute Force to a tag-team match at the April 15 show. MATCH 4: PATCH (with SEBASTIAN NIGHT) pinned GREGORY MARTIN in 7:16. Patch started with power moves on the last-minute substitute Martin; but Marty countered with drop kicks and arm drags. Patch later got near-falls after weakening Gregory with some old-fashioned manager-assisted choking on the middle rope, a back suplex and a clothesline. Marty got a near-fall with a small package. Later, manager Night tried to trip Marty coming off the ropes, causing Gregory to turn around and yell at the manager. This enabled Patch to sneak up and catch Marty in a torture rack, which he turned into a twisting side body slam for the pin. ECWAtron catches up with Kevin Kelly once more, as, speeeeaaaaakiiiiing veeeeerrrrrrry slooooowwwwwwly, he tries to enlist BIG BENNY STOLZFUS for the Connecticut Connection. Benny just growls at them rather than answer them, and the Connecticut guys retreat. MATCH 5: "AMERICAN ROYALTY" ROBERT EVANS (with E.S. EASTON & "THE BUTLER" NIGEL FAIRSERVICE) pinned ALEX ARION in 12:19. Evans and Arion have been appearing regularly on the Connecticut ECWA shows, but this was their debut in front of the Delaware fans. Evans took the mike and complained about how he has been treated here ("They made me fly coach"), but was assuaged by a gift from his manager Easton: a butler, Nigel Fairservice, who up until earlier in the show had been COWBOY BLAZE). Evans's game is obviously power and mat wrestling (although he did try a mean-looking moonsault at one point in the match), whereas Arion tends toward high spots. The end came as Arion superkicked Evans and then hit him with a top-rope dropkick, getting a 2-count. As Arion went to the top rope once more, he was thrown off by Fairservice, after which Evans delivered what was described by Flyin' Ryan as a "pedigree with attitude", getting the 3-count. After the match, Easton told the fans, "That's right‹the butler did it." MATCH 6: "BIG" BENNY STOLZFUS pinned "FAST" EDDIE VALENTINE (with SEBASTIAN NIGHT) in 6:13. Before the match, as usual, manager Night offered a lucky female in the audience an opportunity to "groom the Valentine"; but the only taker was this teenage male with a smiley face drawn on his chest. Night refused the offer, saying "Sorry, but Eddie doesn't swing that way". Benny's power was ultimately too much for Eddie as the Amish giant hit Valentine with his "harvester" pile driver (tm. Flyin' Ryan) and the big splash for the pin. After the match, Benny celebrated in the ring as his "Pennsylvania Polka" theme played. KEVIN KELLY came to ringside to taunt Stolzfus. As Benny turned to clock Kelly, he was ambushed by the three-man CONNECTICUT CONNECTION, with Kelly taunting: "That's what you get, you big, bearded idiot, when you say 'no' to the Connecticut Connection". Kelly then turned his wrath to the fans, as he was joined in the ring by B.W. BROWN, who has not only lost his "oogie oogie" but also any hair he had on his head. He chided the fans for never having done anything for Brown after the thirteen years he had spent giving his all to the fans. He then had the ECWAtron play a tape of the previous month's perfidy committed by TAFKABoogie Woogie. This brought out CHEETAH MASTER and J.J. THE RING CREW GUY, the scheduled opponents for the Connection later in the evening. They demanded that the match start now. So it did. MATCH 7A: J.R. RYDER & INFERNO KID (with KEVIN KELLY & B.W. BROWN) vs. CHEETAH MASTER & J.J. THE RING CREW GUY. The good guys hit the ring flailing. Cheetah hit a suplex and later a back drop on J.R. J.J. punched out Inferno but was attacked by B.W. The Ring Crew guy moved out of the way of a Ryder splash, resulting in Ryder's splashing Brown, who was later superkicked by Cheetah out of the ring. At this time, Kelly took the mike and offered to even things up by allowing the opposition to be joined by someone from the back. Out came the stomach-bandaged VINCE GOODNITE. MATCH 7B: INFERNO KID & J.R. RYDER & B.W. BROWN (with KEVIN KELLY) pinned J.J. THE RING CREW GUY & CHEETAH MASTER & VINCE GOODNITE in 7:50. Goodnite immediately went after Kelly and knocked down Brown in the process. The action then went to many different places. Inferno took the tag belt and clocked J.J. with it, while B.W. slammed Vince, taking Goodnite's bandages off in the process. Ryder eventually scored the pin on Goodnite. After the match, Kelly tried to cause some dissension between Cheetah and J.J., saying that he knows that Cheetah really hates J.J., egging him on. While this goes on, Brown is still stomping on Goodnite outside the ring. JIM KETTNER joined the fray and punched Kevin Kelly out of the ring. Then, all goes silent as a gigantic eye, accompanied by a strange, distorted voice is shown on the ECWAtron screen. The mysterious voice utters (paraphrased): "Kevin Kelly‹me and my buddies are going to put a stop to you. And you, Jim Kettner, your troubles are just beginning". No one knows what to make of this at this point. Who is this mystery man? My guess is that it is someone who suddenly needs a new mission or purpose in life, and I have narrowed down the choices to either (a) John McCain or (b) Bill Bradley. We shall see. As the cage is constructed for the main event, in the middle of the ring are a table, a chair, and a bottle of water. Mid-Atlantic champion TY STREET enters the ring and states that he regrets to inform the crowd that the cage match has not really been scheduled for tonight; but that he will sign the contract for the cage match anyway, even though the match is scheduled for March 25 rather than tonight. Oops, Ty. March 25 *is* tonight. Too late for Ty to escape as his challenger, GLEN OSBOURNE makes it to the ring. MATCH 8: 'THE MADMAN FROM THE BADLANDS" GLEN OSBOURNE won the mid-Atlantic championship from TY STREET (both of them, with BARRY CASINO) in 23:12 of a no-disqualification cage match. Ty was blocking the door to the cage and did not see Osbourne climb over to enter. Glen powered over Ty, slamming him to all corners of the cage as we eventually saw Ty hanging upside down from the top of the cage. As Osbourne grabbed the chair that had been left there from the contract signing, Street did some quick thinking and hit a Tystreetinator on Oz. Ty got in a couple of kicks but found himself strangled with the remnants of his own shirt. Ty then countered with a scissor kick before being clotheslined himself by Osbourne. Street ddt'd Glen on the chair and got a 2-count. Osbourne went for the clothesline but Street ducked and the ref was k.o'd. During the confusion as the ref was replaced, the Ty Street double that had caused so much confusion last month came to the cage, leaping off the top onto Glen. Glen caught Tysatz Erstreet in a chokeslam and went for the pin; but the ref noticed that it was the wrong Ty underneath. Glen then caught Ty2 in a power bomb and this time the ref counted for the pin. However, manager Casino was quick to point out that the real Ty had not been pinned, and since this was a no-dq match, the ref had to restart the match. No sooner did I ring the bell for the restart than Ty clobbered Glen with his championship belt, hitting the mother lode of blood gushers in the process. Both Ty and Ty2 double-teamed Glen at this point until CHEETAH MASTER and J.J. came out to drag Tysatz to the back. Ty then hit Glen with a running chokeslam and got a 2-count. Oz chairshotted Street in the head, and Ty started to bleed. Ty hit a rompecojones and set up Glen for a pile driver; but Glen backflipped him. His head resembling a red geyser by this juncture, Osbourne, blinded by the blood on his face, grabbed the ref by mistake and slammed him into the fencing. Ty then hit Glen with a stunnerand set up the table (still lying along the perimeter of the mat) for a top-rope leap. Osbourne, however, recovered, and threw Street from the top of the cage right through the table. Setting the broken table half on Ty's head, Glen hit a leg drop off the top turnbuckle and then covered for the 3-count as the ref had recovered. After the match, Ty took the belt and saying, "That was a lot of fun, brother", presented the belt to Osbourne as the two embraced in mid-ring. ECWA returns to St. Matthew's on Saturday, April 15, with the usual 7 pm bell time. Already scheduled, along with the aforementioned tag title match, will be the returns of Super 8 participants VIC CAPRI and "THE BLACK NATURE BOY" SCOOT ANDREWS.
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